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Talk yourself into it!

THERE IS a growing tendency for human beings to talk ourselves out of situations that could have led to positive results had our limiting belief system and self-confidence allowed us to remove the restricting barriers.

Sometimes it is habit forming and we don't even realise that we are doing it, but the sub-conscious mind reacts in a way that inhibits potential progress, which could see us stagnate.

Here is a few examples of how we do this:


• I can't do this, and I can't do that
• There are no jobs out there
• There is no point in me applying for that position
• I won't pass that exam
• I don't have any chance of making the team
• I'm not good enough
• It's not worth doing the course

Talking ourselves out of it is a negative mindset. If it continues to prevail, 'the barrier of doubt' and indecision is likely to prevent us from moving forward. It will ultimately affect the decisions we make and will determine, to a degree, the life that we lead.

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What is the challenge for us?

The challenge for us is to try and make a concerted effort to break down that all conquering barrier so that we can put ourselves in a position where we can grow with unlimited choices at our disposal.

The challenge therefore is for us to talk ourselves into it.


• I know I can do this, I know I can do that
• I will look for work
• There is no reason why I can't succeed
• I will pass that exam
• I am good enough
• I will try my best to make the team
• I have as much chance as any body
• I have the ability

Our belief system could be put under pressure, but we are not talking about overnight success stories, but looking at situations in a positive way could help open up the window of opportunity for us.

By talking ourselves into it could propel us to experience unburdened progress, which could in turn lead to successful outcomes for our betterment.

Sometimes we talk ourselves out of things due to fear of failure, but if we talk ourselves into situations we will be giving ourselves far more chances to grow and at the same time we will be able to learn a lot more about ourselves, and in some cases even surprise ourselves.

If confidence is a problem, we can always seek help from some one that we trust.

If we get support from a positive person around us, it can give us the impetus we may have been lacking so that those people can see us benefit. Talking ourselves into it also involves other people around us.

It is always worth remembering that if we do the same things all the time, we will get exactly the same results, but if we start to talk ourselves into it, then may be we can see new beginnings and work towards different results that can enrich us for a brighter future.

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Vicas Livingstone Bailey Jr - CPCP - coaching today for a better tomorrow.

Vicas is an associate member of British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy and BACP Coaching (membership no. 715562)

Vicas began his coaching training with Edinburgh's celebrated Professional Coach, trainer, author and public speaker Gillian Brown, and qualified as a Professional Coach in 2010 after being inspired to influence and encourage positive change.

His work has been published in various journals, including The Moment in West Sussex's First Time publication in 2004, and Tsunami's Anger in the Lewisham and Southwark Independent in 2005.

Vicas' creative background began in 1996 when he was successful in winning the Editor's Choice Award by The International Society of Poetry, for outstanding achievement in poetry for 'New York, New York'. What made this even more special was the fact that it was his debut poetry competition entry.

He was given the (LBSF) Lewisham Black Staff Forum Award in 2009, for services in the Community with young people by Mayor of Lewisham Sir Steve Bullock.

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