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It's Stormzy Wot (almost) Won It, Part 2

COMMANDING A CROWD: Stormzy on stage at Capital FM's Summertime Ball earlier this month

AND YET, that proved to be Mrs May’s first miscalculation in a campaign of miscalculations that have popped the Westminster bubble in which she resides with the so-called guru of Conservative political calculation, Lynton Crosby, the ‘man from Del Monte Down Under’, who delivered an unexpected electoral victory to David Cameron and got knighted for his troubles.

What neither May nor Crosby seem to realise is that social media is forever blowing away bubbles in this new age of Aquarius. Brits ain’t buying that old skool, doff your cap with deference okey-dokey no more. Especially the yutes dem.

Mrs May claimed on the steps of Downing Street two months ago that the election was for our Brexit benefit – but neither leavers nor remainers were ‘avin’ it. She misjudged the nation, and that is critical.

Miscalculation number two was the now infamous ‘dementia tax’. At the time, the Conservatives were so high in the polls, they were untouchable. I mean, they were so high I would have liked to smoke whatever they were smoking at Tory HQ when they came up with the idea of sequestrating old people’s homes. That policy will never make it on to the statute books, but it will be discussed in universities for generations, under the heading: HOW TO THROW AWAY AN ELECTION... FROM A HIGH.


MAN OF THE MOMENT: Jeremy Corbyn emerges from Parliament

What’s love got to do with it? Well, it’s like a love affair. You have to be calculating and you better avoid miscalculation when it comes to choosing the person that you hope to spend the rest of your life with. Back when I was a scruffy and undernourished ragamuffin with dreadlocks, with not more than tuppence to my name, I had a whirlwind romance with – let’s just call her Ms Barbados. She was so pretty I fell for her head over heels. I would have married her. Except she miscalculated that some other dude who was sniffing around was a better prospect than me. She ended up a baby mother, when anyone will tell you that us Adebayos always end-up wealthy and always marry, never divorce or abandon our children.

Miscalculation number three was the press conference two days after the London attacks. Mrs May used the opportunity to demonise Corbyn as the polls were showing that the gamble of a snap election was now looking foolhardy.

Miscalculation number four was the reliance on the press. In the real world, The Sun (which in 1992 reckoned of John Major’s victory ‘It’s The Sun Wot Won It’) can no longer claim to be decisive at election time. Nor any other newspaper. There is a whole generation of voters who have never bought a newspaper in their lives and they look elsewhere for their news and, arguably, Stormzy, Boy Better Know and other grime stars can more likely claim ‘It’s Grime That (almost) Won It’.

Miscalculation number five is down to all those Labour MPs who have spent the best part of two years now not backing their leader. They have to take responsibility for the Tories clinging on to power. How different the outcome of the election might have been if the likes of Chuka Umunna had rallied around instead of showing disunity, disloyalty and thereby exposing the dysfunctionality of their party by waiting for Corbyn to fail and fall.

Judging by the result of the General Election, they may be waiting (as Bob Marley would say) in vain.

To read part 1 of this piece, click here.

Dotun Adebayo is Britain’s most listened-to black radio talk show host. He presents Up All Night on BBC Radio 5 live Thursdays through Sundays on 909/693 MW, The Sunday Night Special on BBC 94.9FM and Reggae Time on BBC London 94.9FM on Saturday evenings. Tune in if you’re ranking!

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